"Happiness isn't a state, it's a skill. It's the skill of knowing how to take what life throws your way and make the most of it."
~Gary Null~
Many of us in the
holidays of the year. Travel plans,
arrangements for entertaining, menu making and food preparation occupy us.
Last evening I was going
through the grocery store with list in hand.
The store was busy of course, and I noticed that some items were in low
supply. A sleepy child was whining, a
husband and wife, obviously out of patience with each other, were snapping, and
the check out line was backed up.
I remembered something that
Dr. Fred Luskins, author of Forgive For Good said at a recent conference on the Psychology of
Forgiveness. Commenting on the importance
of having an attitude of gratitude, he said that anyone who walks through a
grocery store in
Sure enough, it is easy to
take the plenty for granted. Most of us
have more than enough to eat. And even
in this time of economic uncertainty and tighter budgets, we have more than the
necessities.
We now know that one of the
best shortcuts to good mental health and general well being is to remember to
take stock and to be grateful.
Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday for that reason.
Have you written a gratitude
list lately? This is probably the
recommendation that I make most frequently.
And the more dire your circumstances and stress level, the more
magically it seems to work. If you mean
it and take time to feel it.
Put your attitude of
gratitude into action and help someone else who needs help. A young man I know volunteers on holiday
afternoons at a local nursing home, helping to feed residents or visit and play
board games with them. Invite someone
you know who will likely be alone to join your family for dinner. And contribute to your local food bank where
resources this year are probably stretched to the limit.
As for me, my gratitude list
this year is still in progress. At the
top of it is my family, immediate and extended.
This year I became a grandmother for the first time and gained a
beautiful daughter-in-law. My mother’s
side of the family came for a family reunion, and my mother (now 90) and her
sister saw each other for the first time in 2 years. There are too many gifts to recount in this
complex and wonderful and sometimes aggravating tribe that I am a part of.
And I am grateful for you,
my readers, and also for the clients that I work with. I am truly privileged to be paid for doing
something that I love. And am often
moved, inspired and awed at the resilience of the human spirit. It is easy to get discouraged by the state of
the world. But juxtaposed to that are
people who are investing in their own growth, working on improving
relationships and contributing to the spirit of healing the world. And I get to be witness to that.
And I am also grateful to be
living in a place and time of such opportunity.
To have the resources available to create, to learn and to grow. To have friends who are fellow travelers and
are available for support and help along the way.
I hope that as the year approaches an end
and the day for giving thanks arrives, that you will pause to consider and to
share with someone else, your list of gratitude. Say it, feel it and hold it close. Happy Thanksgiving!
