Perhaps it was driving west on the Pennsylvania Turnpike that inspired the metaphor.  There are four tunnels (I was thinking there used to be five) to pass through as you head west through the mountains toward the state line.  Traveling with a friend to my son's wedding in Cincinnati, we were commenting on the feat of engineering that the tunnels represent.

On a bright day there is a marked contrast as you go into the dark, dimly lit tunnel and then pass through the other end, back into the bright sunlight.

I am feeling that sort of experience this morning as I am in "wedding recovery mode."  For the past two days I have managed to unpack, put things away, do the basic tasks of daily living, get to the office to see my clients, go to meditation circle last night, and that's about it.

For two or three weeks prior to the wedding, I was in preparation mode.  Shopping, planning, sewing two dresses, planning some more, emailing and phoning to keep up with details and arrangements, packing and on and on.  And dealing with the emotions that came up with it.  Anticipation, excitement and anxiety.  Would I get everything done?  What if I forgot something?

As it turned out, the wedding was beautiful.  I did get there with everything I needed and immensely enjoyed the events including the parts that I had planned.  Of course there was loads of personal interaction, a reunion with family members, meeting new extended family members, old friends and new.  Lots to experience and to process later.

And now, coming out of the wedding tunnel, I am looking around and blinking in the bright light of my life.  It seems ages since I attended to my blog, my business building, my writing, tracking my finances, and even tending to my house.  There are friends I haven't seen or talked to in weeks.  My living space needs some TLC.

What to do when you feel a tad overwhelmed and discombobulated?  My life coach (daughter) suggests that I pick one goal and complete it.  Keep it simple.  As that has the ring of wisdom sounding through it, I agree. The goal was to write this blog post before heading to the office for the afternoon and evening.  And then before going to bed, I intend to make a work plan for the rest of the week.  It will provide an outline for me to proceed with picking up the various pursuits of my life.  Simple baby steps.

Perhaps you can relate to this.  You have made your vision board, built your business plan, written your to do list and taken action steps and begun crossing items off the list.  Progress at last!

You hear the phone ring.  Ask not for whom the bell tolls…It tolls for thee.  Someone close to you is sick and needs some help.  Or it could be a wedding, a birth, or an elderly parent who needs care. Or you get sick and have to take to the couch for several days.  Whatever it is, it was NOT on your to do list!

These events and more have come knocking on my door, as they might have on yours.  And I must confess to being easily distracted, which doesn't help matters.

So it seems that the plans go out the window, even though you may be still aware of them and feeling a tad anxious or disappointed about losing ground with the new project or process.

Some people who teach and write about goals and how to meet them, sound like the process is a straight shot onward and upward.  For years I thought it should be just like that, and that something was surely wrong with me.  My self criticism was truly discouraging, and then I would think "What the heck?" and just give up.  At least for the time being.

Think of this as an exercise in Perfectionism Recovery.  There may be some people who can do this change process perfectly, but I have never met such a person.  And I am certainly not one of them.  So if you're not either, then take yourself off that hook and consider doing the job "Well Enough," rather than "Perfectly."

Here are some suggestions for coping with life while you get back in the game of change:

• If you're sick, take time to stay on the couch until you feel better.  Ask for help if you need it.  Nurture yourself as well as you would someone that you love madly.
• Get support if the unexpected event is a sad or difficult or stressful thing.  Again, ask for help if you need it.
• Make a list of what needs to be done.  Writing is second nature to me, and you may also discover that it helps to write down on paper what is buzzing around in your head causing anxiety.
• If you are feeling irritated or anxious about the interruption that life presents to you, take time in the evenings to write your gratitude list.  Remember those simple things in life that are still present and sustaining you.
• Give yourself permission to take care of one thing at a time.  That's really all that you can do anyway.  The popular concept of multi-tasking is just a myth that serves as a disguise for distraction.  The brain really does not work that way.  Your goals will still be there waiting for you to resume when the commotion dies down.
• And the most simple and effective thing of all is to remember to breathe deeply throughout the day.  Relax your body.  Visualize a positive outcome.

Recently when I was taking a short time for meditation before attending to something that was arousing my anxiety, a thought came to me.  Everything is as it should be.  I am NOT in control of life.  I can't fix the outcome of other people's choices.  Nor can I prevent the occurrences that interrupt my well laid plans.  But I can proceed in faith and hope, making progress slowly, surely and well enough. So can you.