The Winter Solstice is just days away.  The shortest day of the year which will officially begin the winter season.  I must say that it seems like winter already, even though it isn't official.  The short days, dark skies and general lack of light lend a kind of gloom that is hard to ignore. 

There have also been days of true beauty as the wet snowfall has decorated the trees and shrubs in a lovely blanket of white that contrasts against the black bark.  It softens the stark contours of bare branches and muffles the usual street sounds.

This yin and yang of nature gives a clue to our experiences as the season changes again.  The human culture demands that we get even busier in preparations for the upcoming holidays.  Celebrations to attend, cookies to bake, gifts to buy and wrap and cards to mail.  But we pull against the natural forces that, like water, are going to the deepest part of earth and of ourselves.

Traditional Chinese understanding of the seasons attribute the element of water to the season of winter.  It is a time for going inward.  For contemplation and quiet.  In the West we sometimes forget that we are creatures of nature and are affected by the natural changes that are cycling around us.

And yet some aspects of the Western traditions acknowledge that too.  In the midst of the cold and dark, there is the bringing of the Light.  A time of hope and enlightenment.

The Hebrew Ecclesiastes says "To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:  a time to be born and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to rend and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war and a time of peace."

When the demands of our social life feel at odds with the demands of the natural season, find a way to listen to yourself and meet your needs.  I intend to pare down my "to do" list to the essentials and to those things that have meaning to me.  I am saying no to activity that feels excessive and brings up irritation.  And I am making space in my schedule for lighting the candles and for contemplating the meanings of the season and for connecting with those I love.  I hope you will too.      

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The last month of the year is always a harried time for us.  Part of it is obvious…the increasing pressure of holiday preparations, more social activity, all needing time and attention while the usual work and daily activities continue.  The end of the year is also nearing and I always begin thinking about where I am in terms of what I intended to accomplish this year.  And while it isn't officially winter, in this neck of the woods it sure looks and feels like it.  Some part of me seriously wants to just shut it all out and hibernate!  Sister Bear has the right idea.

No wonder getting a focus is difficult.  But you may still have a certainty that something in your life needs to change.  In some way you feel a need for a healthier life.  The evidence of it is showing up in your medical report, or the scales, or your fatigue, or your bank account, or the friction in a relationship.

Where to start?

Have you ever heard of a mind map?  This is tool that is fun to use and can jog ideas in an unorthodox brainstorming approach.  You can see a hand drawn example and read a description at Wikipedia.org
It is an intuitive way to generate and visualize ideas and to see how one word, task or idea may be related to another.

Basically you would write the issue or question you are clarifying in the middle of the page with a circle around it.  Then in one direction you would draw a line and add an idea that is related to that, and then another that would branch off of that one.  Different ideas or concepts will take off in opposite directions around the main or central idea.

I like to use colored pens or pencils when I am drawing a mind map because it helps me to visualize the related and opposing ideas that I might be struggling with or attempting to organize.  I find this mind mapping especially useful when I am trying to figure out some plan for a task that seems overwhelming.

It is a help in taming the tiger of complex or perplexing problems, and also helps me focus on where to begin and then what the second step might be. 

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Sometimes getting a focus for change is a big challenge.  For one thing you may know that you need to change some area of your life, but not really have a very clear picture of what that change will look like.  You may use your rational mind to collect and sort through expert information.  Getting information is important but often not so early in the game.

If you are in a muddle or feeling overwhelmed, making a jump to the right side of the brain may offer some clarity and relief.  The right brain thinks in images or pictures, as opposed to the words of the left brain. 

Here is something fun to do, and it will also give you a clearer picture of what you want your life to be like. 

• Begin by collecting some magazines.  Get a variety of them, asking friends and family for old copies if you don't subscribe to a variety.  Also buy a piece of posterboard in a color that you like and a glue stick.  Yes, it's time to play!

• Make a cup of tea, put on some music and begin paging through each magazine.  Look for pictures that appeal to you.  Don't think and analyze WHY you like them.  Just quickly go through them and tear out the pages that catch your eye or speak to your heart.  Keep going until you have a pile of pages.

• Then sort through them, dividing them into the following categories for the different areas of your life:  Physical (the health of the body); Emotional (your state of mind and emotions); Relationships (friends and family); Spiritual (meaning your relationship to something greater than yourself); Financial and Career; Lifestyle. 

• You may also find words or phrases that appeal to you that you may include.  If you want some more specific images you can find free photos and clip art on the Internet that you can copy and print out.

• Cut and arrange the pictures on the posterboard, placing them in groups and in a way that is pleasing to you.  There is no right way to do this, so have experiment and have fun. 

       Marie Nemeth in The Energy of Money: A Spiritual Guide to Financial and Personal Fulfillment
suggests that you add a photo of yourself on the board as well as dates that you intend to reach the envisioned goal.

You have now created a Vision Board.  This is a powerful tool for clarifying the direction of your life.  Place it in a prominent place on a wall where you will be able to gaze at it frequently.  You may use it to develop specific goals as well as to engage the unconscious mind in fueling your intentions.

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The Thanksgiving holiday is over, and I am almost through my "recovery mode."  On Sunday evening I had opportunities to talk to a number of friends and family members who all seemed to be experiencing what I was.  A fullness of good memories, lots of food and a general fatigue.

 It was a good celebration and time for connection as well as a few trips down memory lane which brought mixed emotions and then the sadness of parting from loved ones we won't see for quite some time.

And then back to "real life."  What was I doing before the flurry of holiday preparations began?  And more importantly, what do I want and need to be doing now?  Are you as challenged as I am at times to get focused on what matters most?

The next several posts are going to be exploring this question.  It is an important one for anyone who is feeling the discomfort that is a signal that we need to make a change.  That signal may be relationship troubles.  Or anxiety or depression.  Or it may come in the form of boredom or general dissatisfaction.

My grandpa was a farmer who took great pride in working hard and doing a job well.  As he plowed the fields, he knew that the furrows would not be straight if he focused his gaze on the ground in front of the tractor.  Instead, he would find a distant point at the end of the field to look at as he drove pulling the plow.  It might be a tree or a fence post or a rock.  That distant focus provided a marker for where he wanted to eventually be.  And in that way, he plowed the furrow straight.

It is easy to be distracted by what directly lies in front of us.  The routine tasks and appointments of daily life seem to fill up our attention.  Sometimes getting through the demands of work and family life seem to leave little time for considering the bigger picture.  If we aren't intentional about it, there is no time for considering what really matters to us and whether we are living the life we intend to be living. 

It is easy to follow the path of least resistance.  To simply keep treading the ground on the same paths that we are so well conditioned by learned beliefs and cultural conditioning to follow.  But you are not likely satisfied with this pattern or you most likely would not be reading this.

So the first step will be to put yourself in your schedule.  And by that I mean carving out some quiet time to be alone for the sole purpose of considering your life.  There is a rich tradition of people of many faiths taking time out from life for pilgrimage or spiritual retreat.  That would be great, but possibly too much to do at this point.  For now, block out 30 minutes of time once or twice a week where you can be undisturbed.  Use your imagination.

We'll tackle what to do in that time in the next post.

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