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JanetEisenbise on Monday, September 29th, 2008 |
No CommentsAt sundown today our Jewish friends will observe Rosh Hashanah, one of the most important holidays, the New Year. While there is a celebration, it is a time of personal introspection and prayer. After Rosh Hashanah come 10 days known as Ten Days of Repentance. They offer a chance for spiritual renewal and repentance before Yom Kippur, which is to atone for sins between man and God. It occurs to me at this time every year that there are common principles in all spiritual traditions. The Christian liturgy begins with the confession of sins, and the 12
Step Tradition of addictions recovery contains a step of making amends
to those we have hurt or caused injury. The practice of accepting responsibility and making atonement for our shortcomings and errors is an essential step in living a healthy life. We can’t really make lasting change without it.
It is without doubt an uncomfortable thing to do. We would much rather gloss over or avoid assessing the wreckage that we cause as well as the small acts of ommission. We would rather blame circumstances or another person. And yet, being human we all do and say hurtful things to the ones we love. We fail to step up to the plate when our assistance is needed. We avoid speaking up in defense of people who are being taken advantage of, and avoid speaking up even in our own self interest if it means rocking the boat or possibly getting disapproval. We pollute the earth and often refuse even basic recycling because it is inconvenient or means making a small lifestyle change. The result of all this defensiveness is that our infractions and our underlying guilt about it, like an untended basement, begin to accumulate the clutter of broken connections and resentments.
Today presents an opportunity to accept responsibility and to clear out your failings of the past. You might consider them more fully by journaling about them. Allow yourself to feel the emotions that come with that. Take the step of asking forgiveness, unless doing so would cause more injury to the other person involved. Forgive yourself for your Self injury. Take one small step to change a pattern of behavior which injures you, someone else or the planet. And then release it. Let go of it. Mistakes are something that we DO; the mistake is not YOU. You take the garbage from your house to the curb to be hauled away. You don’t store it in your kitchen. And so it is with your past mistakes. Let them go.
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JanetEisenbise on Friday, September 26th, 2008 |
No CommentsThere are a number of common denominators in every sort of life change and the one that has to be at the top of the list is stress. No doubt about it. We live in a very stressful world, and many of us are feeling the effects of a sort of constant background of political dissension, weather related disasters, global conflicts, and threats of financial instability. Yes indeed, change is afoot both on a personal and global front. And stress comes with it.
Have you experienced any of these life changes in the past year or so?
- A death of someone close to you
- Divorce
- Marriage or birth of a child
- A job change, either a new job or job loss; promotion or demotion
- A geographic move
- A change in your financial situation or a threat to your finances
- Child leaving home
- Becoming a caregiver for an aging relative or spouse or child
- A change in your own (or your spouse’s) physical health or mental health
- A conflict or loss in your social circle
Each one of those experiences packs a wallop in terms of stress that you experience. Reducing stress begins with acknowledging it and recognizing its effects. And then, what you might wonder, is a person to do about it? We will continue to explore this and share ideas and resources as we go along.
The best stress "first aide" that I use is to take a few minutes throughout the day to check out my breathing. You might notice that when you are stressed that your breathing is shallow and infrequent. When you notice this, take a short time out and inhale deeply, hold the air in briefly and then exhale deeply. I like to breathe in to the count of 5, hold it to 2 and exhale to the count of 8. Find a variation that suits you. Repeat 5 times. I also focus on relaxing my muscles and take a few stretches if I’m in a situation where I can do that. Try it. Your body will appreciate the oxygen and you will have an effective mini break from the effects of stress.
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JanetEisenbise on Wednesday, September 24th, 2008 |
No CommentsMaybe it’s an early influence of growing up in the center of the USA which is known for volatile weather. Kansas has a saying that if you don’t like the weather, stick around for an hour and it will change. And so it sometimes seems in life. More likely my fascination with change has developed over the years of helping people cope and grow from the changes in their lives, as well as observing my own.
Life changes and that is the greatest certainty that we have. Sometimes we choose to make a change because we are uncomfortable with our circumstances. We may feel dissatisfied, or stifled or bored. And sometimes life seems to turn on a dime and in our world suddenly nothing is the same. Whether we choose it or it chooses us, we are usually dealing with a flood of emotion, confusion and conflict.
We are left with making decisions about the practicalities of daily life, taking care of ourselves and others, as well as getting a grip on what has happened and where we go from here. And then there are the deeper questions of what the change means on an emotional and spiritual level. We are here to share our insights, experiences and resources. We intend to make use of change as "grist for the mill" in discovering gifts and making what may begin as chaos into a positive experience of change.
